An Ode to My Mother

With Mother’s Day right around the corner, I wanted to tell you about all of the amazing, talented and wonderful mother’s I know.  I don’t have the time or energy to do that so I thought it would be fitting to introduce you to my mom.  

My mom’s name is Mary Jo. I still think she’s the prettiest lady in the world.  Her half Irish, half Slavic face in repose is kind and patient. She doesn’t like to cook and her house is immaculately clean. She has a picture of Tupac Shakur in her bathroom. She’s a teacher by trade which explains her innate ability to attract the attention of the room when she walks through the door.  Her voice is quiet and kind and her laugh is infectious. I remember once sitting in church, the priest said something and my mom could not stop laughing.  When my mom can’t stop laughing, no one can. I started and then my dad and siblings.  Our family of 5 quietly exited the church one by one because we could not control ourselves.  That’s my mom.  She’s classy and gracious and fun and can shot gun a beer in under 5 seconds.  My advice would be to not challenge her in this area.     

You don’t realize how amazing your mom is until you’re trying to be one yourself.  My mom is amazing. She created a wonderful childhood for my siblings and I.  Some of my fondest memories were spending summers together at the pool, road trips in our red and tan suburban and going to the library.  My mom would take us to the library every week.  I remember the magical feeling I got when I walked through the doors and my mom would let me wander to find the perfect book.  We read together every night.  As I got older, I would read to her.  It’s a mental picture I will carry with me throughout my life.  They only time I questioned her judgment was when she made me read The Diary of Ann Frank when I was 9.  I was appalled by the events and thought it was boring but my mom always encouraged me to do things that made me uncomfortable and challenged my ideas so for that I am grateful.  Each morning when she would drop my siblings and I off at school she would make us say, “I am kind, I am intelligent, I believe in myself, I CAN do it!” We yelled at the top of our lungs in that suburban and I believed every word. I still do.  

Growing up, my mom made me feel safe.  I was comforted knowing she was there. And she was there for everything. Every sing-along, Halloween parade, Christmas party and field trip.  Every softball game, school dance, graduation, everything.  In elementary school, a boy named Justin spit in my hair on the way home from school because I wasn’t of the predominant faith.  My mom calmly helped me wash my hair even though she was shaking with anger.  She always took care of me first. I sometimes wonder what happened to that boy...I'm sure he works at a car wash.  In middle school, there were a group of girls that teased me for the very same thing.  My mom took me out to dinner and shopping and made me feel like none of that mattered.  That those girls didn’t matter, only me. I know her heart hurt seeing me hurt but my mom had the strength and tenacity to let me fight my own battles and I'm a better person for it.

Mom, I get it now.  I get all of it.  I understand the love that you have for me because I have that for my own kids. There are not enough words for me to describe how I feel about you. So, let me just say thank you.  Thank you for always putting me first, for sacrificing your needs for mine.  When there were only 4 pieces of cake left for dessert, you said “ I don’t really like that kind of cake” and you always ate the burnt toast. Thank you for giving me advice; sometimes it’s advice that I don’t want to hear, but I appreciate your honesty and ability to put things in perspective for me. Thank you for giving me tough love when I needed it most. You walked in front of me as a child, setting an example.  You walked behind me as a teenager in case I needed you. And now you're my dearest friend.  You were right about everything.  I’ll never know how you put all three of us through school while managing to fund all of our little side projects. You never showed it but I know there were so many times you felt like you failed but in my eyes and in my mind you are supermom.  You never gave up. You did what I feel like is impossible now. You made this mom gig look easy.

You’ve instilled in me a sense of resilience and hopefulness and enthusiasm for life and I know I will give that to my own kids as well. In one way or another, in everything I do, you are always my point of reference. There is a reason I think I can do anything. It’s because I listened to you.  

I love you mom. Happy Mother’s Day!